I hate turkeys. If you stand in the meat section at the grocery store long enough, you start to get mad at turkeys. There's turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Some one needs to tell the turkey, 'man, just be yourself.
Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are gods.
After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one's own relations.
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.
Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch.
I love you like a fat kid loves cake!
If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world.
This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man.
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.