Quotes About Humour

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Sam Fisher: Tell me what you know about your friends on the inside. Indonesian terrorist: I don't speak English. Sam Fisher: I'd bet your neck you do. Indonesian terrorist: Well, maybe I speak a little English.

Sam Fisher

Now with the demon flames of this voodoo cannonball, I'll blast my significant other into the significant otherworld, ha ha! That'll show how much I truly care.

LeChuck

In loving memory of... er... thingy. That guy! You know?!

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Rob Millington. The eternal optimist. Found drowned in a half-full bath.

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Did everything just taste purple for a sec?

Philip J. Fry

You could tell by the way he talked, though, that he had gone to school a long time. That was probably what was wrong with him.

John Kennedy Toole

Talking of the walking dead, congratulations to Hugh Hefner, who is getting married at age 84 to 24-year-old beauty Crystal Harris. When asked why she was marrying him, she said, "He lied about his age. I thought he was 94." Calm down. Just don't look at it when you touch it.

Ricky Gervais

Marriage is a wonderful invention; but, then again, so is a bicycle repair kit.

Billy Connolly

A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice.

Homer Simpson

I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

Steven Wright