Quotes By GLaDOS

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Didn't we have some fun though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said ‘Goodbye' and you were like ‘NO WAY!' and then I was all ‘We pretended we were going to murder you'? That was great.

GLaDOS

That thing you burned up isn't important to me. It's the fluid catalytic cracking unit. It made shoes for orphans. Nice job breaking it, hero.

GLaDOS

The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Companion Cube cannot speak. In the event that the Companion Cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.

GLaDOS

Speaking of curiosity, you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what? I know! You're going to find out first-hand before I can finish telling you, though, so I won't bother. I'll give you a hint: you're going to want to pack as much living as you possibly can into the next couple of minutes.

GLaDOS

Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science self esteem fund for girls? It's true!

GLaDOS

These bridges are made from light filtered from the surface. If you press your cheek against one it feels just like the sun shining on your face. It will also set your hair on fire... so don't actually do it.

GLaDOS

The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Weighted Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak.

GLaDOS

Your entire life has been a mathematical error. A mathematical error I'm about to correct.

GLaDOS

Remember, the Aperture Science 'Bring Your Daughter to Work Day' is the perfect time to have her tested.

GLaDOS

Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record, followed by death. Good luck.

GLaDOS