I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning "lousy hunter."
Remember people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold; but so does a hard-boiled egg.
He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.
Just promise me we won't do anything else with them. I want to go back to being weird. I like being weird. Weird is all I've got. That and my sweet style.
Sex is for two things: making babies and revenge.
You look like Gandhi... no, wait, not Gandhi, the other one... Bono.
"Yes, that's what I think, and I'm super smart, so it's probably true."
When people get too chummy with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't really care about them.